Life Sucks Sometimes. Minimalism Is Not Always The Answer.

Minimalism. POOF!

The magic answer to solve all of life’s problems.

Wouldn’t it just be so dandy if minimalism was the simple answer we’ve all been searching for? I’m so sorry to break it to you guys, and to bust all the positive vibes on the minimalist internet today, but I’d say I’m a decent way down this rabbit hole and I am living proof that life can still very much suck sometimes.

Don’t get me wrong, having less clutter + chaos, and enjoying the perks of simplicity does help. One of my favorite quotes is from Gretchen Rubin’s book, Outer Order, Inner Calm.

“Outer order contributes to inner calm.”

Contributes. Take note.

If minimalism was the answer, that word would be left out, right? But it’s not.

When starting this blog, there were a few main goals:

To have a creative outlet. A piece of something that was just mine, to fuel my identity on days when I am otherwise drowning.
To paint an honest portrait of parenting. One our daughters could be proud of. One with balance. So they could read in their own motherhood journey and celebrate their high’s. But also feel supported in their lows.
And most importantly, to share things that work for us, and to share things that don’t.

However, minimalism is one of those things. It works very well. But sometimes, it also doesn’t help with a dang thing.

Minimalism Doesn’t Always Work

Life can be unavoidably messy. Having less physical mess totally helps when the proverbial chaos hits. Again, I one hundred percent stand by that statement.

But sometimes, emotional rollercoasters are unavoidable. Bad days happen. Hormones happen. Valleys in relationships happen.

Heck, 2020 happens.

Moreover, We were never created to be perfect. We were, however, created to feel.

The Path Minimalists Travel

When seeking out minimalism, we all tend to follow a similar path. Purge the items. Declutter the spaces. Organize the things. Clean and maintain.

Lastly, in a final move toward our newfound minimal lifestyle, we reach the point of “now what?”

This, folks, this is the sweet spot. The meat to minimalism. Where we get to choose what’s next!

Often, we’re left with two options.

One: we can choose to focus on perfectionism, and attaining this idealistic life of less.

Two: we can choose to feel.

Scary, right?

Trust me when I say this, you will never do enough #taptotidy or #resetmyspace posts to satisfy your soul.

All the cleared surfaces in the world cannot save you from yourself.

Especially with kids at home, the work will always be there. As a matter of fact, the perfectionism is never done.

Instead, join me on the path less traveled, friend. Join me in the feels zone.

Let’s not forget, if there was ever a year to challenge us emotionally, 2020 is it. Full transparency here, I resisted. Hard. So hard that it’s December and I’m just finally opening up the emotional baggage this year dropped on my front porch.

Do you have trouble sitting in the feels zone. Me too, friend. THIS PODCAST I recently listened to helped remind me pain and fear are not the bad guy. They aren’t meant to be pushed away.

May 2021 be the year of emotional honesty.

May we sit in our feelings, let the discomfort guide us to the work we need to do, and the uncomfortable awareness lead to growth.

Where do we start?

Let’s keep it simple. How about we all vow to do a little bit of soul work each day.

Pick a daily devotional. My favorite resource for simple daily message is the YouVersion App. See which devo I’m up to each week by adding me! Just search ‘houseofeilers@gmail.com’ in the community tab.
Write it out. Here are some journaling prompts from my sweet friend Stephanie.
Read a good book. I keep a running list of my favorites for ‘Life After Minimalism’ here.
Move. Clear your head and make your physical health a priority. Check out my go to free at home workouts for a quick boost.
Share the mundane. Join me on instagram and use #unfilteredswipe to celebrate the in between moments, not just the perfection.

Hopefully, this can be a call to arms. We as a community need to do better to share our middles + our lows right along with our highs. We need to share our remarkably average days. We need to share the mundane just as much as the productive. Because no one is operating at 100%, all of the time.

We need to be honest in that our things, no matter how many or how few we own, are not the dictator of our happiness.