READ :: It’s Not Supposed To Be This Way

To preface: I’m not going through a crisis in my current season of life. We have no struggles with infidelity. I’m not fighting any major battles health wise, or the like. I share none of the major storylines of this book.

I’m somewhere in that in between phase, stuck in the middle of the high highs, and the low lows. And for me, this is one of the scarier spots to be. Because I fear the unknown of what’s next.

Will it be an amazing opportunity for our family?

Or will a heart wrenching catastrophe be on the horizon.

The inability to control the unknown is a major fear for me, and a major trigger of my anxiety (I feel compelled to acknowledge I am aware of this being a privileged fear). This stable season is also a time when I often fall into complacency, I drift from my Christian connection. I get comfortable. Lost.

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Women rave about Lysa Terkeurst’s books. And I’m an avid fan of the Proverbs 31 Ministries app for my daily devotionals. So naturally, as a blooming book worm, and a hungry Christian woman, her books were on my reading list.

I’m going to shoot it to you straight. I’m not a die-hard fan. I would consider myself an amateur Christian. I often really struggle with Christian readings, not able to grasp the concepts. It all so often seems over my head, and I feel like a self conscious kid left out of the convo at the cool table.

To be honest, I struggled getting through Unglued, it took me almost a year to finish. I have checked Uninvited out of the library on three separate occasions now, and I’m still only 50 pages in.

But when I first heard the title to her newest book, It’s Not Supposed To Be This Way, something struck me. Probably because I’m a woman of high expectations. I put so much pressure on myself and those I love. I could list off moments of disappointment and unattainable hype from my childhood all the way through yesterday, easily. Not because I’m ungrateful for this life, but because I’m a planner, I grasp for control every chance I can get to stabilize the chaos of my life.

So seeing those words on the cover of her book, I felt like this reading would be very different for me.

And it was.

This book reached me in this in between season. Where I tend to lose my connection with God a bit. Where I drift into complacency, comfort, and the averageness of a settled life. Where I start to question and fear the “what’s next.”

She walked me through scripture effortlessly. Humbly applying it to relatable contexts that even I, the very amateur Christian, could understand.

It feels like I now have an amazing new tool in my back pocket, for whenever life’s next major dilemma happens. It’s a book I plan to keep on my nightstand so I can reference whatever chapter speaks to me at that very moment of need.

Only because I’ve felt so much spiritual growth through this book, I feel compelled to share it. I wish I could place a copy of it in the hands of each woman I know, who’s heart is riddled with anxiety and fear of the “why’s” of life.

If there is any doubt in your heart, any speck of feeling lost, or forgotten, or left out. In your Christian family, or otherwise. Of feeling like you’re just not getting it, like you’re walking through this alone. Like you can’t figure out why things are going the way they are. Or even why things happened the way they did. If you doubt your past experiences. Why you had to suffer through something, even if it was years ago. Or if you are worried about the blackness of the unknown future, what is headed your way. This book is so for you, sister.

xo

Amy